Singapore - A Gastro Maestro.

Singapore is unique in many ways. It is one of the three surviving city states in the world. It has gone from being a British crown colony merged with Malaysia, to a Japanese occupied war-torn city to now a booming, populous sovereign state. Since 1905, it has also changed its timezone 6 times. Pretty impressive for a place that is only 2/3rd the size of New York City, right?

Well, all this history can get a bit heady if it doesn’t translate on to your plate. And it does. Thanks to its incredibly diverse population and culture, the food scene of Singapore is unlike any other. My husband and I have been to Singapore twice and both times have returned with serious food coma. This is our Singapore food sojourn, some highly-anticipated favourites, some dubious experiments, some dreamy delicacies but all totally memorable.

Chilli Crab

This is a postcard tourist delicacy and no wonder why. Supposed to have had with the shell on, this succulent fleshy creation is Singapore’s no.1 culinary export to the world. Try both the butter garlic & black pepper options, and definitely keep a tissue box handy.  

Where: Jumbo

Peranakan

This is where culture meets culinary. For centuries, countless Chinese families immigrated from Mainland Chine to the regions now called Penang (Northern Malaysia), Indonesia and Singapore. Known as Peranakan Chinese or Straits Chinese, these people married the locals and with that developed a unique flavourful cuisine of their own. In fact the beloved Laksa is a culinary creation of this ethnicity. You can always tell Peranakan cuisine by its abundant use of coconut milk, laksa leaves, lemongrass and tamarind. Among desserts, you must try the Sago Gula Melaka, which is a palm jaggery/sugar shaved ice dessert, light and packed with flavour, it ends your meal on a happy, blissful note.

DUCK SALAD

BEEF RENDANG

LADYFINGER SAMBAL

FISH HEAD CURRY

SINGAPORE LAKSA

SAGO GULA MELAKA

Where: The Blue Ginger

Roti Prata

Soft, aromatic and fluffy, these flour flatbreads are served with a spicy savoury meat (mostly chicken) curry. They come in onion, cheese and other delicious stuffings and prove to be an ideal early evening snack with friends.

Where: Mr. & Mrs. Mohgan’s

Street grub

For all those wanting to pig out in the city, be pleased to know that Singapore has some of the most delicious meat dishes – be it duck, beef or pork. And you don’t really have to shell out a fortune to taste these glocal grubs. Some unmissables are Hainanese chicken rice, spicy pork noodles, BBQ duck with tofu rice, red bean dumplings, Singapore spicy sausages, deep fried pork balls, roasted pork belly. If you want to go out on a limb and try something radical and really local, I would suggest the durian coffee. It is creamy and rich with the signature garlicy flavour of durian. Legend has it that people have passed out on the smell of this oddly-expensive fruit so the challenge is not for the weak-hearted.

SPICY PORK NOODLES

RED BEAN BUNS

SPICY SAUSAGES

ASSORTED STREET FOOD

ROASTED DUCK

ROASTED DUCK RICE PLATE

ROASTED PORK

HAINANESE CHICKEN RICE

FRIED WANTONS

DUCK IN RED BEAN GRAVY

Where: Maxwell Food Centre, ChinaTown

Din Tai Fung

From a failed cooking oil business to making the best dumplings in Asia (if not the world), founder Yang Bing-yi has scripted one of the biggest food success stories in history. His little drops of heaven, golf-balled sized, white translucent dumplings filled with pork, shrimps and chives are things to cherish forever. In fact, it’s something that makes you keep coming back for more. Although almost everything on the menu is lip-smackingly good, my best lunch was pork xiao long baos with the lemongrass juice.

PORK XIAO LONG BAO

Thirst Quenchers

Singapore has some of the fastest walkers on the planet, which means it has some really cool and delicious ways to re-hydrate. 

HANDCRAFTED BEERS AT CLARK QUAY

THE HUMBLE JASMINE GREEN TEA

OPTIONS GALORE

All this food talk made you hungry? Maybe it’s time to plan a quick trip to Singapore. The clammy tropical weather doesn’t really provide a “best time to travel” tip, but if you plan it around a national holiday like Christmas or the Chinese New Year, you are sure to experience an even more enriching culture fest. Time to Singapore, la!

When power corrupts

When power corrupts…

Is corporate India misogynistic? Is a question I’ve been asking myself for a few weeks now. Very recently the news of TVF CEO Arunabh Kumar surfaced about sexually harassing a woman. Not long after, more such allegations surfaced from multiple women coming out and openly speaking about facing similar workplace issues. The funny thing is though, there is no official FIR from these complainant. They are either anonymous blog posts or casual disclosures of the matter. The first reaction whenever we hear news of a woman complaining of harassment at work is victim-shaming. We imagine there are vested interests and we say, “She’s doing it for money.” If that is the case, then why not fuel the fire with an FIR, why not come out in the open and really get the bull by its horns. Why be anonymous? What is the vested interest there? If multiple women have come forward, in one way or other, means that this is more than a smokescreen. And after listening to Mr. Kumar stereotype “heterosexual & single” men, I am convinced this man needs therapy and education. Over the years, we have seen powerful men, from Trump to Phaneesh Murthy to Tarun Tejpal, abuse power on women. When you hold such tremendous financial and social power over your juniors, when you are a star on the rise, then you come with a sense of entitlement, and with a sense of lawlessness that makes you feel you can get away with anything. This leads you to rise above your position, your responsibilities and see the world beneath with a pair of supremacy-tinted glasses. A British historian once said “power tends to corrupt”. It is only the most matured and evolved of minds that go unfazed with power. Men of a different mental-build handle power of position and respect for others in the same degree. Most men corrupt.  

Harassment doesn’t always have to start with a hand run-down on the thigh. It could start small – with personal things, which leads to dependency and even promises of career advancement. And as the pressure builds on, so does the severity of the abuse and assault. And when it is time to end or “abort” mission, there is the proverbial wrongful termination of employment.

In a workplace where the sex ratio is skewed, harassment is commonplace and happens to us all, we admit it or not. The gravity of it varies. Solution: To not keep quiet. To talk about it, share the experience because if he has done it to you, he probably has done it others before you. And in cases like these, the only way to stop the victim-shamers is with proof of numbers.

You see what you want to see.

No matter how much you try to change perception, people will see what they want to see. They are so bound by their own thoughts and their "world views" that they don't let new light shine through the darkness. It indirectly bullies you, it makes you question your ability and worst of all, it makes you hate something you love. These people are wound up by their ways. Their stubborn minds make them slaves of misconception. Their refusal to open their eyes makes others blinded as well, especially those who aren't brave enough to follow their own instinct.

Advice is to stay away from much negatives. But the issue is that life is full of such negatives. The trick is to shrug it off and not let it affect you. What has no power over you can never sway you to change. And you don't need to if you know you're doing your best. So, at a time when I am facing a certain dilemma of "who I am" and "Who I should be".. I choose to remain to be who I am and nothing changes that. I continue to smile and wave, and joke and chat but they will never know of my self-awareness. My silence may mistaken for weakness and they will never know the strength at my core that stopped me from breaking down and molding into someone I am not. 

Goa-n with the wind!

As I am growing older, I am realising that there is no point playing it safe because at the end of the finish line, your FDs arent getting converted into Furla bags or solitaires. The only thing that is worth anything in this life is an adventure, the rush of doing something for the first time, the memories of doing something for the millionth time and each one of those times being unique. It is one life afterall, if you're not going to be bold, you're going to miss out on a lot of life. My Goa trip this time was different, understandably, when i went there with this mindset. To enjoy without caring about what is safe - it's funny how much your mind opens up when you are willing to blur the lines.

Well the adventure for Goa started before we even got there -- with a train at 8.40 from Dadar, we were stuck on Villa Parle WEH, trapped inside a bumper to bumper with zero hopes of getting anywhere. Obviously we decided to pick up our bags and make a run for it - literally to the station, catch the fastest local and somehow make it to the train. The adrenaline was pumping and I knew we were in for a treat. This was a couples trip, but the train journey was odd-numbered - 3 old friends getting together to catch up on life.

We reached Margao pretty early in the morning and started our journey down south. Our plan was to spend 2 nights on Varca beach and 1 night at Anjuna. We knew we were going to a budget resort but we ended up here. 

Tucked away on the secluded Varca beach is this resort. Clean, cozy and loaded with happy vibes, Majestic Beach Comforts was nothing what I had imagined. With a small grassy patch in front, it made me want to buy my own land and build my own little cottage. It's the thoughtfulness of the place that really made a mark with me. They had given a cloth-hanger to dry your wet sandy clothes. The Pool was a bonus!

I wanted to read about Varca before leaving but ironically nobody had much to say about it. "just another beach" was my biggest takeaway. Nothing prepared me for the pretty rich marine life we spotted - schools of starfish, crabs, sting-rays. The solitude became so addictive that everywhere I went, I sought it. 

I think as you grow older, you start leaving behind the noise and go for the quiet. Varca made me realize that. For a forever-loud person like me, I just reveled in the peace that it offered.

Among the many things we did, riding up to my husband's old home-stay back in his Lila Training days was a highlight. Memory lane, here we are :)

Another big find was the Mobor Beach and spotting the Milky Way. At a time when it was pouring silly along the coast, we found a cloudless sky, a light-less beach - & we gathered up to tell ghost stories. Heaven!

Food is always the cherry-on-top of every traveler's story. This time I have decided to leave the epicurean tales for another rainy day. But one incident I do wish to report is a terrible stroke of luck and bad timing that resulted in a group of 8 educated and informed souls like us to get straight-up duped by this reputed shack-cum-restaurant called Kentuckee (remember the name). Situated on Colva beach, although with no sea-view, this place was the only one within miles to be serving booze on 2nd Oct. Needless to say we made a beeline to this smoke and beer-bellied-reveler infested joint with a very hungry tummy. The crafty (we know now) elderly waiter suggested the seafood platter which wasn't on the menu card and none of us had the good sense of asking  the cost of it. Although the food was otherworldly, the price we paid for it was too - the total bill of 9700 INR. The platter itself costed 7000 since all the constituents were priced "as per catch". We checked platter prices having the same old crabs and lobsters elsewhere and nowhere did we see it exceed 5K. So people, stay away from such foolishness and always ask for the price before you order something out of the menu card. 

However it didn't take away from the Sunset we watched later and splashed salty water on each other. 

It's funny how Goa is always associated with raving and partying all night, with food and the sea, but very little do we ever talk about the houses of Goa. Because that is typical of it too. No-where will you find such diverse selection of architecture style. From Mughal to Portuguese, it more or less covers the full spectrum of India's colonial history. What caught my eyes this time was the Portuguese-styled Bunglow mansions, you know with the shady big balconies in front called "balcaos". It takes you way way back into a time when there were no modular kitchens or in-floor heating systems, simpler times. As I sat on the back seat of our puny little motorbike, I couldn't help but marvel at these sights that more often than not get lost in the daze of a boozy head. 

Couldn't help but wonder about the people living inside those home -- "Are they stuck in time too? What would they do they had to live a life like ours, local trains, cold dabbas for lunch, deadlines? Are they happy? Do they wish a different life?"

Wanna know how we did Varca to Anjuna? 1000 bucks for 2 bikes for 24 hours. Bad deal? Not so much. 

The highlight of our brief halt in Panjim was an ethereal lunch at this little Goan cafe called Viva Panjim. From the Mackarel rechado to the pork sausage preparations to even the Vindaloo - etched in memory forever. Zomato says 800 for 2, I say 2000 for 6. What a bonus!

North Goa isn't North Goa this time of the year -- it's more like a slightly louder and brighter south Goa. But we were blessed with great cloudy weather and a rampaging sea which made morning teas and walks more memorable than ever. 

The fearless adventurer in me didn't let the ominous clouds or dubious faces come in the way of exploring. Thank Goodness!

Lastly this trip was about old friendships and new - to rediscover them in a whole new light, and to cherish them in a whole new way. 

From doubt to discovery : The journey so far

It's been a while since I have written - 7 months to be exact. It's not lethargy or disinterest, but an unyielding stream of events- some great, some good and some very ugly.

Well as they say, start with the good. It's probably old news for some, but I shifted back to Mumbai, this time with husband in tow. My new home is no longer under a sink. It's a place , little bigger than a shoebox in an upscale locale in Andheri west. Probably the reason we're paying through our noses and every other crevice in the body for it. Someone recently asked me if my marriage had changed since I moved, well it has, drastically. It feels "married" now.. The meaning of "partnership" and "bonding" and "patience" and "facepalm" is all redefined now. Not that living with in-laws isn't great, but there is some magic in THIS. Everything takes on a new meaning, your attitude and behavior towards the guy/girl you love changes when you know that no one is watching. Funnily you also become independent and more-dependent-on-each-other at the same time. So yes, highly recommended to live alone/separately for the first few years after getting married. Coming back to current topics, I went back to advertising, against much of my own wanting. I knew I was going back to horrendous work-hours and unreasonable work-load but what was in store was much much worse. For the first time in my life, I doubted myself at a job I knew I was good at. I obviously didn't do enough research before accepting the job or the clients handed to me and I was given the raw end of a raw deal. A broken team was handed over to me assuming I am some Magic GodMother, who can just swoosh her wand and make all the troubles go away. I also had the grave misfortune of meeting probably the most vile, blame-slinging bitch in the business (read client). Being good at one's job basically gives her the license to be an intolerant, oppressive bully - something I wasn't going to take. Add to that, an unmotivated junior, a half-wit AF boss and a too-cool-for-school superboss.  Losing my nerve and mind were the first things to happen, what followed was a flawless loss of self-doubt and all motivation to wake up in the morning. The first casualty of this kind of professional abuse is work-life balance and mine went for a toss. For 2 months, I was living with a stranger whom I would meet at an ungodly hour (if i were lucky that night). I would leave, before he was up. At this point, at the end of the 2 months, for the first time, I felt my marriage being tested and after much dialogue I decided to quit. At a time when you see your world slipping away, I had one person telling me "Dont worry, i'll take care of everything else. Doesn't matter if you don't get a job." I think that night, i fell in love with him all over again. I think that's what a marriage is - underneath all the Instagram and PDA and sweetnothings and frivolous fights - its knowing that now, in a planet populated by a trillion people, you have 1 person you can blindly, unconditionally count on. And quit, I did.. and obviously a lot of dirt hit the fan. But I was not going to hold back either. After making my peace, and also giving a piece of my mind, I moved on not knowing how two of us would survive rent and Mumbai on a single salary. But fortune favors the brave and that's what I was I guess. So the very next day I got a call from a tech start-up that was looking for a digital writer and manager for their new app. Voila! Wonderful how things fall into places where you wanted them, not at that time but when you are ready. Getting to do a job you love comes to very few and I feel lucky today to be sitting here and writing this. In a way I am glad things happened the way they did because today I appreciate a good opportunity more than I ever did. It's been 2 months here and it is (knock on wood) the life I started out to live in Mumbai - simple, risky with handful of drama and a pinch of magic. 

Find your ROOM

Its been a while since I have cried at the movies. After you have been exposed to emotional heavyweights like "Notebook", "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind" and my favorite sinking ship, "Up" (note the irony), I thought it would take a lot from a movie to get me going for the tissue box. All that changed when I sat down to watch ROOM. The story is simple - a mother and son, living in confinement for 5 years, finds a way to escape and then laboriously attempts to return to their normal lives. But if you really try to understand the movie, you discover this discomforting and ultimately very rewarding tearjerker, teaches the true essence of happiness. Happiness isn't what the world defines, or what society outlines or what popular culture throws in your face - you can live in a 4x4 room and be perfectly happy. All you need to do is find your center. In the case of the mother "Maa", it was her son, Jack. Although she plotted to escape for her son's sake, she was actually perfectly happy living in that room with Jack, with whatever limited resources her captor provided. It was once she found freedom and "normalcy", she was overwhelmed with expectations and norms, not knowing that the reason of her happiness hadn't changed one bit. That is what we do to ourselves also, isn't it? In a world of a billion people, we actually need just a handful, to make us perfectly happy.. and knowing that full well, we pile on expectations, rules, status quo and what not - just because it feels normal and almost obligatory - not realizing the reason for our happiness hasn't changed. The idea is to feel fully and wholly content sitting at Marine Drive, drinking cutting chai, crunching down peanuts and being at peace... and not sitting across each other at the latest "Instagram-approved" eatery, heads sunk into your smartphones, having empty conversations. The idea is choosing your happy place and deciding to stay there even if it doesn't fit the norm. 

So after shedding a bucket-full of tears and distilling, "You're just Maa", it dawned upon me that you don't have to take on relationships with a fear of heading for disappointments. You don't need to fit your relationships into some cookie cutter to fetch approvals. You just need to find your ROOM, where you are content.. and stay there!

Our Displaced Sense of Reverence

The public is still getting over the Ganapti-hangover. 10 days of food and festivity, modaks and miravnooks, dancing and devotion.. all comes to an end with a bang. This year I had the great fortune of visiting the golden-boy of all Ganapatis, Lalbaugcha Raja. For you to understand his stature you need to know the facts: The idol is made on-site annually by Kambli Arts, it attracts roughly 2 crore visitors every year, the deity gathered 86 Lakhs worth of gold within the first 3 days of the festival, over 7 Crores in cash during 10 days, Border Security Force personnel are specially deployed to guard the deity, Bhakts stand in line anywhere between 12 to 90 hours in line to see the idol. 

Thanks to a close family-friend who had contacts with a certain state-minister, we got VIP entries and like the thousand others, I went there with my prayers in mind, hoping for a serene one-on-one with the Vinayaka. Afterall, I was a VIP, how bad could it be?! Well what I thought and what I saw is almost like the difference between client budget and client expectation. The police were openly accepting cash-for-entry so anyone could be a VIP , which means it was no longer going to be a select, peaceful viewing. The police escorted us into a 3000-odd sq ft area which eventually lead to the main hall where the deity is kept. This area was already packed with VIP worshippers, from hoity-toity CEO types to regular Joes of the world. There was no line, no particular order that they had to follow which means all hell broken loose. Children were being tossed around like luggage, barricades were being trampled up, women were being viciously and indecorously shoved and muscled over. Rough and uncouth men bulldozed their way in by mercilessly pulling clothes and hair, almost as if they owned the joint. Howling and panting babies were commonplace (not sure what kind of a mindless mother would bring a toddler to a place like this), local "dalals" who had an unholy alliance with the cops, broke-down whatever little order one could find by forcefully and almost threateningly inserting their clients ahead of everyone else. Twice, I found myself stiffly stuck and bruised, hair pulled & disheveled, senses disoriented and almost choked with breathlessness. All this chaos were right under the nose of the "management" who had taken up the uphill task of managing a crowd so wild and defiant and at times criminal that they couldn't give a damn but to watch helplessly. At any moment, one poor soul would trip and fall and a stampede would break-out. It was a lot like traveling in the local train, once you are a part of the crowd, you move with it, without having to move a muscle of your own. And before I knew, I was standing in front of the most mesmerizing idol I had ever seen. Standing at 20ft, this grandeur surpasses only his popularity and acclaim. However I found no peace there, as again I was very painfully shoved against a metal barricade that left me aching for the next several minutes. After I drifted downstream like a lone leaf in this sea of people, I wondered what does this enigma, this adulation, this glory all mean when people leave this place all choked-up and hurt? When we have come to god's abode to seek his blessings, where is our sense of kindness and tolerance? How can we behave like savages and seconds later join hands in reverence? How can one God be so overwhelming that allows us to lose our basic human manners ironically at the same alter where we ask for the ability to be and do better? As I pondered this on my way out, the incoming crowd didn't seem to end, while the majority non-VIPs kept standing still, some for more than 30 hours straight. Funny you need ministry connections to make your own divine connection, yet another inexplicable irony of our unique society.  Weird thing is, as I pen this down, I know I want to go back again next year, witness the same enigma, bow in humility and maybe walk out with a more pleasant experience .. I guess that's the magic of this King -- he makes you hopeful!